Final Documentary
Rough Cut
Self-Portrait Without a Face
CRITIQUE
Jenna, Ok, good start. Please work on the following:
- Intro: do not jump right into an interview. lead us into your story - what will this film be about? Set it up so we understand your concept. Use your song here.
- during first interviews, no lyrics over words, very hard to hear the words (soft music ok, but no lyrics)
- sideways footage...
- don't cut mid-sentence, be precise with your edit points
- text tells us about Rya, but we never see her... confusing
- then we see the woman from the beginning (school clinician), but we still don't know who she is (introduce her)
- Do you have more footage? Convert all your AVI footage using either the program under "resources" on the main blog page, or download this program: http://www.squared5.com/
- basically you need to work on the structure of your film. make sure we always know who the person is who is talking (name on screen). Also try to show your subjects doing the things they talk about (cut back and forth)
- missing your voice. possibly use up front to introduce your concept?
- I know you have faced technological hurdles, and because of that you are a bit behind. You can catch up. You have a great concept here, but it's still quite rough. now its time to edit,edit, edit! build your story. You can do it!
- email me, scott@skmphotography.com, if you have additional questions. good luck!
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